As has been mentioned, there are so many memories of Mom and how she raised us; it’s tough to choose just one or two. I’m going with three qualities she tried her best to instill in all of us; good manners, kindness, and common courtesy.
One example of the first, good manners, concerns table manners. I don’t think I’m the only one of us kids with fork marks on my left arm from it being poked when it was on the dinner table. To this day I remember and feel those pokes any time I find my left arm on the table while eating.
The second, kindness, was highlighted by what she did and said when we were strolling through the halls of Highgate about two months ago. She said hello and had a kind word for every person we encountered. Some people were somewhat grouchy in their response, and she said to me, “You can choose to be kind or choose to be cranky. It’s easier and much more pleasant for everyone if you choose to be kind.” Every Highgate staff person would testify that Mom was a kind person.
And finally, her emphasis on common courtesy is epitomized every time I say or hear “please” and/or “thank you.” I appreciate that she was so militant about this, because in my experience, I’ve found you can’t say these two words often enough. When John visited the cemetery on Saturday, I wouldn’t have been surprised if he had reported hearing a series of thank yous coming from Mom’s grave site. “Thank you, Connie, Mary, Jan, Jim, John, Tom and your families, for helping me when I needed you the most. Thank you, Father Dick, for a beautiful ceremony and your kind words. Thank you, all my family and friends, for being there to send me off in style. Thank you, Schnider Funeral Home, for handling all my arrangements in a compassionate and professional manner. Thank you, Highgate staff, for making my time with you so pleasant.” And if I had been there to hear this, I would have responded, “Thank you, Mom, for the life lessons you taught us. Thank you, Mom, for the legacy you’ve left that will continue for all time.”
6 comments:
I think of all the same qualities that were passed down to Shannon and me - minus the fork stabbing. I had the same experience with Grandma at Highgate in August - always saying hi and asking how their day was. She was the best.
Wow, Tom, you got pretty sentimental there! But I have to agree that all of those beautiful traits live on in the Moore prodigy. I think all of us show them to some degree, maybe not as perfectly as mom did.
Well said Tom, although I don't remember the fork stabbing.
I remember the boys getting the fork for sure! And Mom always said why would you choose to be unhappy or cranky when you can just as easily be happy? Great lesson and one that I try hard to follow~
Thanks, Tom – those are great traits that she passed along.
Yes, I remember the fork lessons. Dad had his approach, too – if I had my elbow on the table, he'd grab my forearm, lift it, then bang my elbow back down on the table.
We did the fork thing with our kids, so it must have happened to us otherwise where would I have learned it! Tommy, this was beautiful! It is great yet tough to read these. I have yet to not cry when reading a new memory but these will be great written memories to read time and again!
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